Me, Myself, and Mr Strallan
by Henley2020
Summary: Alt Edith
1. The Heart of The Matter

**This is only my second fanfiction and my first Downtown one. I always thought that so much more could have been done with Edith's character so I decided to play around with it a bit. This is definitely an AU so be warned. I will upload new a new every Friday.**

 _ **Chapter One**_

Two months, it has been two months since Edith's world turned upside down. The day after the Garden Party Edith had gone to Loxley to speak to Sir Anthony to check on him. Seeing as he all but ran from the party the day before. But upon arriving she had been informed he was out of the country for the unforeseeable future; solemnly she made her way home. Naturally, as if the day could not get any worse, the first person she saw when she got back to Downton was Mary. And naturally, Mary being Mary was her usual snide, sarcastic self, retelling Edith (with much glee) the conversation she had with Sir Anthony. How she explained to him what Edith "really" thought about him, and how Sir Anthony had believed her. As Edith listen to the retelling of the conversation she fought with her emotions, willing herself not to give Mary the satisfaction of letting her see the pain she had caused her.

Much like with everything else in her life, Edith was unsuccessful. For the tears began to fall down her face in steady streams as she apologized to Mary for everything she had ever done or said to Mary that could cause her to hate her so much she would ruin her chance with the one person she truly loved. With a roll of her eyes and an annoyed huff of air, Edith was informed that she was not forgiven, and Sir Anthony was only a taste of the hurt she could inflict on her. And cautioned her to remember that the next time she felt the need to be petty again.

It was that conversation with Mary that Edith saw her relationship with her sister for what it was. Petty, and hateful. And she was tired of it. Tired of trying to one-up Mary, tired of trying to match her at wits, and verbal warfare. She was tired of trying to expose her for who she really was and always coming off looking like the pathetic jealous little sister.

And so, it was then that Edith vowed she would do her damnedest to stop being the person that she was. Edith soon let the snide remarks go unanswered, the cruel words she left unacknowledged or she played them off. It was not an easy feat, so badly had she wanted to fight back. But as days passed the fight in her dwindled. And she began resorting back to her preteen days of being invisible. At first, she had been hurt that no one had noticed the change in her, but soon she began to relish it. Figuring it was best not to be noticed in this family. Only coming down for meals, speaking only when spoken to, and trying her damnedest not to be seen. And with what the war and everything else that was going on at Downton it wasn't hard to be forgotten. After all, she never really was a top priority for her family.

Sighing Edith wiped a tear away. She had tried hard to forget Anthony, but all attempts have been futile thus far. "Oh, Anthony how I miss you so." She spoke quietly to herself as she leaned back against the soft cushioning in her reading nook, that was in her bedroom by the window. In her lap was a book of Anthony's, it was a big book as thick as the bible filled with many hand-written notes within the margins by her love himself. He had let her borrow it two days before the Garden party. Happy for her to read it and get some insight into his world of agriculture which he enjoyed.

She lightly ran her fingers over his handwriting as she fought back her emotions. Wanting nothing more than to merely be in his presence she threw the book angerly across her room. Taking shaky breaths, she wiped her tears away with one of the hankies he had given her on one of their drives when they had gotten caught in the rain. She tried to hate him she truly did, but when she remembered their days together all attempts of anger and contempt towards the tall, tawny hair blue-eyed man was rendered useless.

Deciding it was best to get some fresh air so she could calm herself, and hopeful loose the depression that was slowly descending upon her. She gathered her coat that held the lingering scent of parchment, tea, and freshly cut pine that could only be associated with her time with Sir Anthony Strallan. She set out for some much-needed air.


	2. Wine and Dine

_**Chapter Two**_

"Edith," It was the hand on her shoulder that pulled her out of her thoughts. Turning she came face to face with Mathew.

"I'm sorry cousin Mathew I was off in my own world." She spoke in a despondent tone.

"I was just telling you it is time to go in."

Looking around the parlor she saw it was empty, "So I see it is." Standing she made a move to join the rest of her family when Matthew's hand was once again on her shoulder.

"Edith." Turning she was once again she was face to face with Matthew, with a look of concern and worry on his face. "Are you feeling alright? You haven't been yourself recently."

A small smile graced her lips " _Of course cousin Matthew would be the only person to take notice of my recent sullenness"._ She thought to herself before answering Matthew. "Thank you, cousin Matthew, for your concern but truly I am fine."

Not letting her walk away, he spoke once more. "I am always available if you ever wish to speak Edith."

Smiling once more she nodded her response before joining the others in the dining room.

" _Goodness me if I have to sit here any longer and have to listen to someone cater to queen Mary any longer I think I may die."_

Edith was on her fourth glass of wine and she had fallen deeper into her sulking mood. Per usual the men in the room were focused on Mary, Edith couldn't help but roll her eyes as her father spoke proudly of her exceptional horsemanship. Edith, of course, remained silent, speaking only when Isobel spoke her briefly about the hospital. Only two months into the war and there were injured soldiers filling the bed at the small Cottage Hospital. Edith had agreed to go down tomorrow to volunteer on behalf of the Crawley family.

Edith deep in her own thoughts scoffed into her glass of wine at the notion she the least favorite Crawley daughter was to volunteer on behalf of the Crawley's.

"Well dearest sister Edith, do you disagree?"

Turning to Mary confused she spoke cautiously "I am sorry Mary dearest but I was not paying attention to your conversation."

"Really?" Mary asked smirking getting ready to set the bate. "I heard a scoff coming from you."

"Oh yes, I did indeed scoff. But you see my scoff was not pertaining to your conversation, as I have no bloody interest in it." She answered matter of fact turning back to her dinner and taking a bite of her dinner roll.

"Edith Violet Crawley." Her father said tersely. She turned in the direction of her father. He was giving her a look that was she knew all too well. A mixture of anger, disappointment, and embarrassment. "Please apologize at once."

Looking up she noticed that all eyes were on her. Cora had the same look as Robert, The Dowager looked utterly scandalized, and cousin Isobel was rather passive looking.

"Right." She set her fork down and patted clean her mouth with her napkin. "I am so very sorry for my unladylike language. I know not what has come over me. It was quite rude, uncultured, ill mannered,"

"Impertinent?" Sybil said from her seat rather enjoying the scene.

"Brash." Edith said raising an eyebrow to Sybil who smiled.

"Vulgar" Sybil said rather happily getting one more in before her mother shot her a warning look.

"Uncouth one might even say." Edith turned back to the guests with fiend sincerity.

"Jolly good one." Sybil piped up.

"Sybil you are not helping, and Edith I am warning you." Robert snapped.

"Yes, as I was saying." She smiled. "Please do forgive me Mr. Napier, and Mr. Talbot for being Uncouth this evening and speaking ever so vulgar." She gave her best apologetic face finishing her speech.

Both gave her the nod of the head in acknowledgment both highly amused.

"You are forgiven my dear Lady Edith." Evelyne Napier was the first of the two to speak.

"Indeed, all is forgiven." Henry Talbot spoke from across Edith.

Soon after the outburst Edith found herself in a conversation with Henry and Evelyne about modern farming. She enjoyed the talk, but it did make her think of Anthony making her wish he were at her side proud of her as she spoke of her knowledge on a subject he loved so.

With dinner ending Edith quickly tried to make a dash for her room, only to have her efforts thwarted by the two guests of honor.

"Lady Edith I do hope you aren't trying to make a getaway?" Evelyne said suddenly at her side.

"How you know me so well Evelyne." She smiled at her old friend.

He smiled and took a seat next to her as Henry made his way over to them.

"Trying to monopolize Lady Edith are we Mr. Napier?"

"Not at all Mr. Talbot. Not at all."

The three passed the evening discussing various subjects. Both men were highly intrigued and impressed with the range of knowledge she had about many things that were deemed unladylike therefor many of there woman companions never spoke of them. Such as farming, engines, and things of nature.

Cora watched the three closely mostly keeping an eye on her second daughter. Taking notice that there was something different about her that she couldn't quite place. The beginning of the evening Edith was quiet and the two men who were occupying her company paid her no mind. Now the two Gentlemen were all but fighting for her attention, and it was as if Edith either didn't care or didn't notice. Turning her attention to her oldest daughter she sighed recognizing the look that was on Mary's face. She just hoped for everyone's sake Mary would wait until they were in private before she went into one of her full-blown tangents.

"Cora?" Violet whispered to her daughter in law. Getting Cora's attention, she discreetly called her over in hopes she could speak to her in privet in regards to the attitude of her second grandchild.

"Mama." Cora greeted quietly as she sat next to her mother in law, in a corner looking over everyone. Sybil, Isobel, and Marry were sitting around the settee in a deep discussion (well Sybil and Isobel were seeing as Mary was to busy glowering at Edith. Whose laughter mingled with now her two suiters. Not that she realized.) Matthew and Robert were by the canter discussing the war.

"What on Earth has gotten into Edith?"

"I am not quite certain, If I am being honest with you Violet."

"Although I am glad to see that she has finally come into herself, it is so very unlike Edith to act as she put it so eloquently before uncouth."

"I shall have to have a talk with her tomorrow."

"Mary doesn't seem to happy with the changes in Edith. I believe this may be the first time she has had her suitors no longer interested in her."

"I fear Edith just may have woken a sleeping beast in Mary."

"By the looks Mary is giving the poor girl, even I fear for the retribution in which Mary will do to Edith."

Edith grew tired and excused herself from the two guests.

"Mama, I have come to excuse myself for the night."

"Very well," Cora said as she received her customary kiss on the cheek. "Oh, Edith I would like to have a word with you tomorrow. I shall send for you."

Just as Edith was going to answer there was a clearing of a throat. Turning her attention to the nervous man before he Edith gave a friendly smile.

"Lady Edith I was hoping that you would accompany me for a walk. It has been an offal long time since I have had a tour of Downton, and I was hoping to see our old alcove on the east end of the property."

"A tour of Downton I say that sounds like a plan. I have yet had the honor of a tour, and the weather looks promising." Came the voice of Henry Talbot.

"Very well, we shall have a tour at the request of the guests of honor. Although I have to let you know Henry as highly as I think of you, am afraid you shan't be able to enter our Alcove. For it is a secret place that only a few know of and you've yet had an initiation."

"Don't feel too bad Mr. Talbot not even I know where this secret hideout of theirs is. I've been trying to find it since I was five." Sybil interjected.

"Oh, Sybil you should come along so you can keep Henry company whilst Edith and I reminisce our youth." Evelyne said happily.

"I would be happy to join. Maybe together Henry and I can finally uncover this secret Timbuktu."

"Don't worry Lady Sybil where there is a will there is a way." Henry gave Edith a wink.


	3. Turning Point

_**Chapter Three**_

"O'Brian would you please let Lady Edith know that I would like to speak with her?"

"I am sorry M'Lady but Lady Edith has left for the hospital minutes ago."

"Why on earth is she going to the hospital? Is she alright?" Cora asked quickly.

"Lady Edith is perfectly okay. From what I understand Mrs. Crawley asked if she would like to volunteer today with the new solders that have been placed at Cottage Hospital."

"This is the first I am hearing of this." Cora said a little upset that her daughter had made plans without informing her.

"I am sorry M'Lady. I can have her sent to you first thing when she gets back."

"Thank you, O'Brien. Thank will be all."

"Of course, M'Lady." Bowing she collected her mending and made her way downstairs.

"Lady Edith." Dr. Clarkson greeted cheerfully. "How very lovely to see you. Please have a seat and I shall discuss with you what your job will intel today."

Smiling she walked into the office. Sitting she reached for the offered cup of tea. "Thank You, Dr. Clarkson, the tea is quite lovely."

"I may not know how to cook, but I do know how to make a good cup of tea." Edith smiled and took another sip. "Now my dear," Clarkson spoke in a much more serious tone. "We have a few men that have come straight from the trenches. They are not from around here and their families are unable to make the trip to come and visit whilst they recover. That my dear is where you will come in. Talk to them, help them write to there families, even read them a book. Anything to help them take their minds off of there injuries, and the war." Edith shook her head in understanding.

"It seems fairly easy."

"I must warn you some of the men have horrific injuries, both on the bodies and in their minds. We may have only declared war with Germany Two months ago, but we've been fighting battles for a year. Some of these men have been there since the unofficial start." Edith once again nodded in understanding, Clarkson continued. "Some of them won't want to talk, or they may seem rude and standoffish but give it time and don't take it too personally. If you have any troubles with anyone come to me or Mrs. Crawley. If you need any medical assistance asked one of the nurses. Any questions?"

"Not at the moment." She smiled before drinking the rest of her tea.

"Alright then." He stood opening his office door. "Shall we?"

"We shall." Edith replied.

Later Edith would look back on July 5th, 1914 as the day that changed her life. That night after spending the day with the wounded Edith went straight to her room and stayed there the remainder of the evening. That night she cried, she cried for Anthony and hoped that he never ended up in a hospital a broken man. It was also that evening when Edith decided volunteering wasn't enough. She needed to do more and after talking with Dr. Clarkson at the end of her shift she decided that she was going to become a nurse, go closer to the fighting so she could be of better use. Though she decided to keep that part to herself knowing that her family would never allow her to go through with such a plan.

That night Edith fell asleep with two things on her mind Sir Anthony and her life changing plans on which she was eager to go through with.


	4. On the Town

_**Chapter Four**_

"Good morning all," Edith said cheerfully. "Papa." She said as she gave him a kiss. Walking over to the breakfast table she was joined by Evelyn.

"Good Morning Edith." He said happily handing her a plate.

"Evelyn how are you this morning?"

"I am quite well now that you have arrived."

"I do concern." A voice from behind spoke up startling both Evelyn and Edith.

"Gracious me Henry. You gave me quite the fright." Edith laughed.

"Do forgive me, my lady." He said as he dramatically bowed kissing her hand he smiled. "Lady may I inquire if you are free this morning. It seems like a lovely day to take a trip into town."

"I would love to. We can leave after breakfast. Which we should get started, wouldn't want to keep the staff waiting on us when they too have to start there day."

The three of them began filling their plates. Not noticing the piercing glare of Marry, or the concerned protective glances Robert was giving them. Sure, he was protective of all his daughters, but over time he had grown accustomed to suiters going after Marry, even acquiring over sybil. But for some reason, it bothered him to see two men fawning over his middle daughter. It brought out a paternal side of him that he was unaccustomed to where Edith was concerned. And he did not like it, he did not like it one bit.

"I think that sounds like a fantastic Idea," Robert interjected as the trio made their way to the table. "It would be good for all of you to go into town. Sybil you will be to find that book, and

Mary, I'm sure your riding boots will be in by now."

"Oh, yes I would love to go into the village." Sybil cooed as she polished off her toast.

Edith let out a giggle when she saw the crestfallen look of Henry. "Don't worry we'll lose them somehow." She said leaning into him and whispering.

The action did not go unnoticed by Robert. Huffing he stood. "If you would excuse me. I have some business to take care of." Not waiting for responses, he headed straight to Cora. Surely, she would know what to do.

Breakfast passed without a hitch, and soon the group of five was on their way into the village.

 _ **Meanwhile at Downton…**_

Briskly Robert made he was to his private quarters not stopping to knock as he entered. Cora watched him through the mirror as he passed back and forth behind her.

"All finished M'Lady," O'Brien announced.

"Thank you O'Brien You can take your leave now. And please send Lady Edith in I would like to speak to her today since she slipped through my fingers yesterday."

"Actually Cora Edith, along with Mary, Sybil, Evelyn, and Henry went into the village," Robert spoke up. "So, you may take your leave, O'Brien."

Robert waited for the door to close before he turned to his wife.

"Cora, I don't like how Napier and Talbot seem to be taken with Edith. You must speak to her about leading these young men on."

"Robert, I thought you liked Evelyn and Henry? You liked them when they were potential suitors for Mary." Cora asked as she settled herself an armchair by the window.

"I do like them, and they can potentially be a good match for Mary, but not for Edith I would not a prove with the union." Robert continued to pace the room, an anxious air surrounded him.

"Robert you Can't." Trying to put her thoughts into words Cora sighed. "You can't have a double standard for your daughters. If Edith decided to court either Mr. Napier or Mr. Talbot we have to support that decision. Because we would if it were Mary."

"Mary is a different case she. Well she." Stumbling over his words Robert sat. "I don't like the Idea of Edith courting. Her and Sybil are too young. The reason Mary needs to start thinking of suiter is because she is older, and we needed an Heir. But not Edith, No I don't like the Idea of Edith courting"

Cora smirked to herself. To many even to herself at one-point Mary seemed like the favorite child of the Earl of Grantham. But in all reality, he and Edith were closer. Every Morning since Edith learned to read they would sit and go over the paper, as she got older he would mar things for her to read over, and by lunch she would have the paper analyzed, and was ready to discuss it in depth overeating. Even though Mary was to be the Countess of Grantham it was Edith that sat in on Roberts business and walked the grounds with him, listening to him prattle on about the history, and agriculture of Downton. Cora knew that out of all his daughters it would be Edith's wedding that would affect him the most.

"Robert. Don't you think Edith deserves a little happiness? After it isn't every day that Edith is the sister stealing away a suiter from someone, better yet Mary. And after everything that has happened with Sir Anthony. I think you should just let her have her fun. They shall be leaving soon enough anyhow."

Slouching back in his seat Robert ran a weary hand over his face. "Very well, but I don't like it. And I shan't be at ease until both men are out of Downton."

Cora laughed softly as she stood and made her way to him. "Don't worry so much Robert." She said as she snuggled into his lap. "Edith is uninterested in either one of them. I am not completely sure she even knows that they are practically fighting for her attention."

Chuckling Robert kissed Cora's head. "I did notice that this morning."


	5. The Let Down

**Chapter Five**

The trip to the village had proven to be a delightful distraction for the young men and women of Downton. They happily walked from shop to shop admiring the window displays, and even venturing in a few of them. It was at the bookstore where everyone got split. Mary opting out of books made her way across the street to the dressmaker. Sybil quickly grabbed Evelyne's arm and dragged him into the bookshop, sending Henry a conspiring wink.

"Poor Mr. Napier, when it comes to books Sybil can spend ages looking them over and conversing about which one would be the best read. Usually, she ends up getting sidetracked and ends up with a new set of colors." Edith laughed, as Henry took her by the arm and lead her down the street.

"It seems I have lucked out then," Henry replied in a mirth-filled voice.

"You're probably the first person to ever think that about me, let alone say it."

"I can't see why not." He said leading her down the path that leads to the park area. "I have enjoyed your company these last few days. Quite different from other Ladies I have encountered. You are honest, but not mean-spirited about it. Not afraid to speak your mind. It is in honesty very quiet refreshing."

Edith blushed and smiled. "Thank you awfully for the ever so kind compliment. I used to be that way, not long ago in the matter of fact. But you see I had a change of heart, tired of trying to one-up Mary and appease everyone else. I decided to throw all caution to the wind and say au diable avec ça." She said smiling.

Henry chuckled and lead her to a bench that overlooked a field.

"Lady Edith, as I've said earlier I have very much enjoyed your company. And I was hoping that you would do me the honor of agreeing to allow me to properly court you."

Edith's eyebrows raised and her eyes went wide in surprise.

"Oh, dear Mr. Talbot." She said slightly embarrassed and unsure what to say. Having never been in this situation before. "I am very flattered, but I am afraid I must decline. You see my heart belongs to another. And even though we are not currently courting and might never court for that matter. I still have to decline."

"Surly Lady Edith you can just give me a chance to prove to you that we can make it work."

"I am so very sorry but like I said my heart belongs to another for the time being. And it would be unfair to give false hope for a successful courtship."

Sighing Henry nodded his head and gave a small smile. "I understand." He said quietly. They said in silence for a moment when Henry turned to her and smiled. "I won't be giving up that easily though. Not until this other bloke has a ring on your finger. I won't push you either. For now, that is, but next time I visit I shall pester you until you at least go with to a dinner."

Laughing Edith patted his hand and stood. "Come on Mr. Talbot we best be heading back."

The walk back to the bookstore was filled with laughter and good fun. Much to Edith's pleasure as she didn't wish for anything to change after Henry's proposal.

"And where did you two run off to?" Mary practically snarled as the two in question rounded the corner. Edith bit her tongue and willed her eyes not to roll.

"Edith be the lovely hostess that she is. Gave me the grand tour of the lovely little park down the way." Henry happily replied.

"Yes, well be must be heading back now," Mary said as she turned around and began walking.

Sybil rolled her eyes then turned to Edith. "She is just a ray of sunshine today, isn't she?"

Edith laughed and shook her head. "You three go on, I am volunteering at the hospital so I should head over now."

"You have to go now? It's getting late. What about dinner?" Evelyn inquired disappointed that he wouldn't be able to steal Edith away on the walk back.

"I will eat with Dr. Clarkson and cousin Isobel." Edith turned to Sybil. "Please inform mama and papa that I will not be home for dinner."

"Will do," Sybil said giving her a mock salute. "Come on boys let's catch up with Mary." Taking both of their arms she quickly leads them away.

Catching up with Mary Sybil let go of Henry and Evelyn's arms and took Mary's.

"You could at least give me a fighting chance you know," Evelyn spoke once out of earshot of the two Crawley girls.

"Whatever do you mean?"

"With Lady Edith. You keep whisking her away before I can barely get a "how do you" in. It's very frustrating you know."

"All is fair in love in war, my good chap." Henry joked as he patted the other man on the back. "She's not interested anyway."

"Oh, I suppose she is madly in love you."

"No, apparently there is another bloke that got to her before us. By the sounds of it, he holds her heart."

"And how do you know all this?"

"She told me when she rejected me." Henry let out a laugh. "Lucky bloke he is."

"And who is he exactly?"

"I don't know she didn't say."

"Hmmm" Was the only reply Evelyn managed as he rearranged the packages in his arms. "Why is it that men always get stuck carrying the packages back?" he grumbled.

"Because it's our job dear chap," Henry said happily before whistling.


	6. Taking Charge

**_Hey everyone thank you for the reviews. I would like to say first and foremost I am not a writer, I went to school for political science, and US History. While I do know how to write a damned good essay, I have no clue how to write a nonfiction story. So please bear with me. Secondly, I am an American from the States, so I am not very well informed on British nurse schools, and military regulations regarding the woman (Or regarding anything for that matter) back during these times. And while I am pretty knowledgeable on the U.S.A's involvement in the Great War, the campaigns, military regulations, and the works. I've not a clue when it comes to Britain. So, whilst researching so I could try and be somewhat correct. I found that Britain is a very confusing place, and I shall leave it at that. Not everything is correct and I apologize_**.

 ** _Now back to the story._**

Edith walked leisurely through the village. Wanting to take her time so she could go over in her head how best to pitch the idea of nursing school to cousin Isobel and Dr. Clarkson.

"Lady Edith, good afternoon." A cheerful nurse by the name of Florence that Edith had befriended the day before greeted her.

"Florence hello." She smiled "How are you this fine day?" Edith slowed her pace down so that they were walking side by side.

"Very well thank you. Are you spending the day with us again?" She asked hopefully

"Yes, I am." _"I wonder if I should ask Florence about how she became a nurse to gain some more insight before I make such a big decision."_ Edith thought to herself. "Florence may I ask you something?"

"Of course, milady.?"

"Please, Edith is just fine." Edith corrected feeling a bit embarrassed at the title that she once prided herself on, but now felt foreign when addressed by it.

"I couldn't possibly," she said shyly, having grown up learning the proper adequate on how to address nobility.

"Please, I insist. If we are to be co-workers and friends Edith or even miss Crawley is fine. Lady Edith feels too formal."

"Very well Edith," Florence responded by testing out the name.

Smiling Edith continued. "I wanted to inquire about nursing. You see I've decided that it is something that I would like to pursue. And you being a nurse I was hoping you could give me some sort of insight on how to go about doing it."

"That is jolly good Edith. I think you will make a wonderful nurse. You are very tentative and caring for the patients."

"Thank you, that means a lot coming from you," Edith said blushing lightly not used to receiving compliments.

"I am sure after nursing school Dr. Clarkson would happily let you on here at Cottage Hospital."

"Actually, I was hoping to work closer to the front, where men are being heavily wounded. I think I would be of most use there."

"Like in the QAIMNS. A relation of mine has joined the WRAF, she is in training as we speak she is. We are mighty proud of her."

"Florence what is the QAIMS?" Edith asked intrigued.

"It's Queen Alexandria's Imperial Military Nursing Service ."

Edith's brow furrowed together in thought, she had never heard of the WRAF. But wondered how she could find out more about it.

"Yes, I would like to do something of that nature." They approached the hospital sooner than Edith had anticipated turning to her companion she stopped walking. "Florence if could you please not mention this to anyone that would be greatly appreciated."

"Not to worry Edith I won't say a word." Florence gave a kind smile before they continued there walk up the hospital stairs.

It had been an easy day at the hospital nothing too pressing just cleaning some wounds and changing of bandages. Mealtime came rather quickly, in Edith's opinion at least.

In a staff room off the side, that was for higher up staff, dinner was being served. The meals were never complex. In the winter normally, a simple soup and fresh bread were frequent. Edith sat quietly eating the stew that was served to her a few minutes ago. Dr. Clarkson wasn't there yet, it was just her and cousin Isobel who was going over a file as she ate. Finding that she was more comfortable with Isobel she decided to speak to her alone. Swallowing Edith took a breath and patted her mouth clean.

"You can do this Edith." Taking another breath, she cleared her throat. "Cousin Isobel, I wanted to speak to you about nursing school."

Eyebrows raised Isobel closed the file and looked at her. "Really?" She asked somewhat surprised. "Well, that is fantastic."

"Thank you." Edith blushed at the praise. "I considered the many different options I could choose from to help the war effort. But I decided that Nursing would be the best suited for me. I have read that many of the nurses now are volunteers that often don't have previous medical experience. If I could go to a school and learn the right skills, I believe I could be of use."

"I am proud of you my dear," Isobel spoke happily as she patted Edith's hand. "This really is wonderful. But have you spoken to your family about this? No offense meant Edith but I do not see your father, mother, and especially your grandmother being too thrilled at the thought of you leaving home before marriage. More so than to become a nurse."

Edith smiled, "Trust me cousin Isobel I have thought this through. And while I am almost positive papa and grandmama will not approve, I am of age."

"Here, here." Isobel praised happily. "Spoken like a true feminist."

Edith's eyes grew wide. "Oh, dear." Edith laughed "While I am flattered we best not let my father, better yet dear grandmama here that I have become a feminist." Isobel let out a hearty laugh followed by Edith.

Isobel took a drink of her water before speaking again. "An old friend and college of my late husband by that name of Bernard Thomas is the head of a very prestige nursing school in London. If you are certain that this is what you want to do. I will happily contact him tomorrow."

"Oh, Cousin Isobel that would be greatly appreciated. I am certain this is what I want to do."

Isobel gave a soft smile. "You will be a great nurse, my dear. You will absolutely love the school in London, I went there, and that's where I met Reginald. He was a big hot shot doctor, all the nurses absolutely loved him."

The rest of the meal was passed with pleasant talk, provided mostly by Isobel. It wasn't until Dr. Clarkson joined them that Edith excused herself and went back to work. Determined to finish at least two more letters for the soldiers before she had to leave for the evening.


	7. Tea in the Afternoon

**_I've rewritten this chapter many times uncertain of whether or not I was doing the characters just. it's not the best but it's the best that I can do when it comes to the Crawley's. As you've noticed I've really made the characters my own so please don't hate me, also please ignore the historical inaccuracies I'm trying my very best to get it right. Anthony will be coming along shortly so don't worry please stick around. I've had to scrap my original storyboard for it seems the more I keep writing the more I the story takes on a life of its own. So not even I know what's to come next._** ** _Thanks for the reviews now on with the story._**

A week had passed since Edith got the news from cousin Isobel that she had been accepted to the nursing school in London, and that she had two months until her first day.

Edith, of course, had been ecstatic to have been accepted into such a prestige nursing school. But the excitement soon faded when she realized that she had to inform her family of her plans and ask her father for money so she can attend such a school. Ever the champion Isobel had offered to be there with her when she broke the news to the Crawley's. At first, Edith thanked her but respectfully declined. Not wanting to drag her into the family drama, and having Isobel be blamed for anything. But eventually, Edith's resolve broke as the day of reckoning drew near.

Edith decided to wait until all the guest were gone before she broke spoke to her father. That was five days ago. If it weren't for cousin Isobel Edith was sure that she would have never had the courage actually go through with it. She had tried to speak to her mother first, to try and test the waters. But Cora was still in a state of mourning for her unborn child and Edith wished not to burden her.

"Hello Edith?" it was the wave of a hand in front of her face and the calling of her name that pulled her out of her thoughts.

"Oh, Papa. I am sorry, how awfully rude of me. Were you there long?" She rambled nervously.

"No," He said looking at her curious "Cousin Isobel has just arrived. She says she is to have tea with us and speak to us regarding some matters of the hospital." He spoke almost accusingly knowing that there was something going on. What? He wasn't quite sure. "I don't recall setting up said meeting. Would you by chance happen to know what this pertains to?"

As she opened her mouth to speak, a voice stopped her. "Edith dear there you are. Oh, and cousin Robert you're here as well." Isobel said happily. "Shall we start?"

Edith swallowed nervously before speaking. "Papa, if you would have a seat I shall call for tea." Edith was trying to be confident, and although the presence of Isobel was helping she couldn't help but feel like the same hapless little girl her father thought her to be.

By the time the tea had arrived Edith was beginning to feel more at ease. Whilst Isobel politely conversed with her father Edith was once again giving herself a pep talk. Noticing the lapse in conversation Edith took the opportunity and spoke.

"Father," Mentally berating herself for sounding so nervous and uncertain she took a deep breath before trying again. "Father, as you know I have spent the last week with at the hospital with cousin Isobel and Dr. Clarkson." She began sounding more confident this time. "I have come to find that Nursing is something I would like to peruse."

Robert was quiet, uncertain in what that meant. And hoping it was not what she thought. "I don't seem to understand what you are saying."

"There is a school in London where I can go to learn how to become a proper nurse." Edith nervously spoke doing her best not to look her father in the eyes.

"Absolutely not." Was the almost immediate response of her father.

"Cousin Robert what Edith wishes to do is a very good deed, especially in these times. I've seen her in the hospital and I know she has the potential to be a grand nurse indeed. If you would just give her a chance."

"No," He barked out. "Edith you are a Lady, and while I mean no offense to you cousin Isobel. But nursing is not exactly a Noble profession. You may volunteer as you wish. But you will not be attending this school in London." He spat out angrily.

"Please father, I have already been accepted." Edith didn't have to see her father to know that there was a look of unabashed anger on his face.

"You went behind my back to sign up for a school in LONDON. Without consulting me?" Robert sat his cup down angrily. "Does your mother know about this?"

"No, no one other than cousin Isobel knows."

"Cousin Robert if you don't mind me saying, but I think that you are being completely unfair. Edith has every right to do as she chooses. And if she chooses to become a nurse then you should play the part of father and support her." Isobel spoke rather tersely.

Cora was walking down the stairs heading for tea when she heard the angry shouting of her husband, followed by the angry shouts of a woman. Who's voice oddly enough sounded like Cousin Isobel. Quickly she made her way down the stairs. Her eyebrows shot up when she confidently confirmed that indeed it was cousin Isobel who was having a shouting match with her husband.

"What on earth is going on in here." Cora interrupted Robert mid rant. Spinning Robert came face to face with his wife.

"What is going on." Robert was red in the face as he spoke. "Is your middle daughter has the absurd notion that she will be attending a nursing school on London."

Once again Cora's eyebrows raised in disbelief. "Edith surely you can't possibly think that is a wise decision."

"I believe it is aperfectly wise decision, and I also believe it is my decision to make." Her ire rising as she spoke.

"And cousin Isobel how do you fit into all this?" Cora asked her eyes moving from her middle child.

"She was the one that planted the silly notion in her head."

"I did no such thing. Edith came to me for advice, and I simply informed her about her options."

"You're the one that got her into the damned school." Robert spit out.

"Robert!" Cora exclaimed. "That is no way to speak. Now! Sit and let us all talk about this like rational adults." Cora took his arm and made a move to the settee.

"There is nothing to discuss. I said no and that is final." Robert pulled his arm out of his wife's grip.

"Papa, let me do this one thing. For once let me do something that is going to make me happy."

"Edith dear, we can find some other activity for you to do. Something a little more dignified. Like helping with this year's spring festival. We should also focus on getting Mr. Napier, or even Mr. Talbot back to Downton. They both showed great promise as potential suitors. I am positive with a little nudge in the right direction you will be planning your wedding for this time next year."

"Cora, a marriage is not the answer to this." Robert bit out hating the thought of his daughter being married off.

"Robert she is of age and she is not getting any younger." Tuning out her mother she turned to Cousin Isobel who was looking at her with sympathetic eyes. Giving an encouraging smile and a nod of the head that Edith took as a silent approval. Edith stood and spoke to her parents.

"Enough." She nearly shouted. Both Robert and Cora turning to her in surprise mouths hanging a gap.

"Mother I do not wish to waste my time on such mundane activities such as comity planning. Not now when I know can be doing something of actual use in this time of War. Nor do I wish to be wed to a man whom I do not love just for the sake of being wed. I understand that I am not the favorite of your daughters, and I except that with. Sybil being the babe, always so outgoing and easy to get along with." Looking more to her father she continued. "And with Mary being the beautiful, smart, brave, strong willed one. There is not much that I do that can compare. I lay no blame on you for I know that I could be rather unpleasant to be around, with always trying to compete with Mary, well it would seem that I lost myself. And became this spiteful angry person that I am now ashamed of." Taking a shaky breath, she continuied "I understand your apprehension, but I ask you this one thing. I'll beg you on hands and knees for it even. Please just give me your blessing and support on this."

"I said no, and that is Final. This is the last I want to hear about this. Without my money and support, you will not be going to London." Robert was going to speak again when Edith stood from her chair and quickly walked out of the room. Ignoring her father's demands for her to come back here.

 ** _I hope you like it. When I read Downton fanfiction sometimes I feel like people are a little too hard on Edith. She is not perfect and I know that but not all the blame is to be put on Edith. Mary has no excuse to be as cruel as she is. within the relationship of the Crawley girls, I often see the O'Hara girls from gwtw. although I feel like Scarlett's Behavior was more Justified and even she had a moment of self-realization._**


	8. Game Plan

As much as she loved her husband Cora Crawley sometimes wished she could strangle the man, especially at times like this. She understood where Robert was coming from. The Crawley's were English nobility they had a reputation and image to maintain. And to have one's daughter be a nurse well, It just wasn't heard of amongst there class.

Cora sighed as she sat alone in the Library. Shortly after Edith left the Library Isobel excused herself and left. Leaving Robert and Cora alone much to her liking as she wanted to have a word alone with her husband. But before she could even get a word out much like Edith Robert quickly left the room, Isis following him. She debated at first whether she should go after him, ultimately deciding against it. Thinking it best for everyone to calm down and compose themselves.

Leaning her head back against the chair she couldn't help but think of the things Edith said. About how she felt that she wasn't as loved, or important as he sisters. Unable to hold back the tears from knowing that she had let her daughter down, she sat and thought about how to make things right with Edith.

Edith didn't know what possessed her to speak to her parents in such a manner. Never would she have thought she had the courage to tell them how she really felt. She could here grandmother's words in her head "You must keep a stiff upper lip child." And today she had failed miserably, although as she walked the grounds she couldn't help but feel guilty for having said what she felt. In a matter of fact in some way, it felt freeing to have gotten all of the hurt, and resentment towards her parents out. It was like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders and she couldn't find it in herself to care.

Sitting down under her favorite old oak Edith racked her brain about what to do. She knew that one thing was for certain, she wasn't going to let her father control her life. There had to be a way to be a way for her to go to nursing school.

 _"Maybe Aunt Rosamund will help me."_ Edith thought. _"Surely she will understand."_ Then like a lightning bolt it hit her. She did know someone who was a "modern American woman" as she once penned herself in a recent letter. Surely, she was just the person who would be on her side wholeheartedly. Standing, Edith dusted herself off and quickly made her way back to the manor.

 _Dearest Grandmama,_

 _I know wrote not too long ago, but now I am writing for a reason that is very important to me. The last few weeks I have been volunteering at Cottage hospital in the village. Whilst spending time at the hospital, I have found that I enjoy it and decided that I would like to peruse a career in nursing. With the help of Cousin Isobel, I was accepted into the London Royal Hospital for school, and to train. The only problem is that upon hearing the news Papa refused to pay for my schooling and has prohibited me from even thinking about a career. For you see we are a Nobel people and a woman born into such an esteemed family we are breed to bore an heir, and be the head of a comity, whilst hosting the occasional hunting party. But you see even now as I put to paper what my future is to hold, I am horrified. I want something more and I feel that the only way I can achieve my goal is through nursing. That is why I am asking you if you would ever so kindly help me and pay the tuition for nursing school. I am committed, and I promise you if you decide to help me I will not let you down. Tuition is £100 and has to be paid in one month and three weeks. Although by the time this make it to you it will be more like a month. If you decide otherwise I will understand. Also, I would be ever so grateful if you could not tell Mama, or Papa I have written you on the matter._

 _With much love, Edith_

Placing the letter in the envelope Edith sealed and addressed it before ringing for making her way out of her room in search of a certain chauffeur.

"Mr. Branson that goodness I have found you," Edith said relieved when after twenty minutes of discreet searching she stumbled upon him walking up the path from the garden.

"I am sorry 'Milady I was having my break, and I thought it a perfect opportunity to walk the garden. Such a lovely day out I couldn't resist."

Smiling Edith nodded in agreement. "I do agree, this garden even though it isn't as popular as the others on the property, is my favorite." Looking down at her hands she remembered why she was in search of the man before her in the first place. "Ah, Mr. Branson the reason I have been looking for you is that I need your help. You see I have this letter here that needs to be sent off immediately, and normally Mr. Barrow would be in charge of such matters, but it is very important that no one knows about this. And I trust that you can be discreet and quick to get it sent off."

"Of course, Milady. I won't be sayin' a word to no one." He said with a tip of the hat and bow of the head.

"Thank you ever so much Mr. Branson." Edith thanked him practically crying with joy as she handed him the letter. "Please have it sent express." Pulling out her pocketbook she pulled out some money and handed it over. "This should cover it."

"I'll leave right away Lady Edith."

"Thank you again, Mr. Branson, I don't know how I can ever repay you."

"Nonsense Milady, it is my job."

Edith just gave a smile knowing that it would do nothing but waste time to try and convince him otherwise. "Well thank you either way."

With a nod of the head, Branson quickly walked back to heading straight for the garage.

* * *

 _ **I would like to thank everyone for the reviews. I never thought I would but I thrive on the feedback. I find I am having trouble with the dialog. I find myself writing more of how I speak, instead of how one would actually talk in 1914 UK. Which is pretty bad seeing how my grammar is a cross between Jane Austen and Cardi B. Earlier in the story I mention WRAF please forget about that for now. I jumped the gun, and it was supposed to be the QAIMNS. Sorry for the late update, I know I said Fridays for updates but I was up late trying to finish this chapter for you guys.**_


	9. Now We Wait

In typical English fashion, no one spoke of what happened that day in the library. Robert carried on as though nothing had happened. Choosing instead to hardly acknowledge her, not giving a second glance and spoke to her even less. Though Edith didn't mind; as she had no want or desire to be near him either.

She was too concerned with more pressing matters. Like how else she was to come up with money in such a short amount of time; if her grandmama decided not to help her. Groaning at the thought of grandmothers Edith laid her head down on her desk. Willing a headache her granny had given her earlier that day to go away.

Though there was no proof, Edith was almost certain that her granny not threaten per say. But gave her a cautioning, to get "such such foolish ideas such as nursing" out of her head. Or else certain measures were to be had, so that Edith did not cause any more unwanted scandal. What measures? Edith had not a clue. In all honesty, she expected nothing less from the old matriarch. Although it did surprise Edith that it took two weeks for her exhorting. Seeing as such "pressing" matters like this one was usually taken care of right away. Before getting out of hand and became unmanageable.

The disapproving looks and haranguing proved to be futile. As Edith became more determined than ever. Fueled now by the redundant opposition from her family.

Taking a deep breath Edith's head rose and her eyes' focused on the letter that lay on the desk. It was what felt like the hundredth draft of a letter she has been trying to write since the war broke out. But every time she tried to put pen to paper all words eluded her. Leaving her without a clue on how to put her feelings into words. Edith felt as though she was not at fault, for it was he who had thought the worst of her. Leaving without giving her a chance to defend herself, and discredit Mary.

"That's what hurts the worst about this whole bloody mess. That you didn't trust me." She confessed to the empty room. "You didn't trust the love I have for you. And me, I should have told you my sweet one how I felt in the first place." Picking up the letter she gave it a once over before crumpling it up and throwing it in the waste bin. "Damn me and my damned English propriety!"

"Lady Edith." A voiced called out as she turned the corner, now almost out of sight from the Abbey. She stopped at the calling of her name. Turning, she saw Mr. Branson as he made his way over to her. It didn't take long for him to reach her. "Lady Edith, I am sorry to interrupt your walk, but I have something for you." Discreetly he pulled white envelopes out. "I saw these in the pile before Mr. Carson had a chance. I hope you weren't presumptuous in taking them."

"No thank you ever so kindly Mr. Branson. It is for the best that my father doesn't know about this. And we both know who Mr. Carson's loyalty lies with.

Mr. Branson didn't say anything, giving a slight smile and a nod of the head. Not wanting to overstep his boundaries.

"Oh dear me. I am sorry Mr. Branson. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."'

"Her lady-ship has a right to speak as she pleases."

"Yes, well others may disagree with that." Edith snorted.

Smiling Tom nodded his head in agreement. "Give it time milady."

Parting ways Edith made her way to her favorite old oak. But half way there she came to a complete halt when she read over the addresses from which the letter were sent.

* * *

I am sorry for the short chapter I've been really busy. But I did manage to sit down and write this our real quick. I am unhappy with the last chapter but I find I do not have to time right now to go back and rewrite. But I will eventually. I hope you like this chapter sorry for the cliff hanger, I promise Mr. Strallen will be around shortly. Please let me know your thoughts until then Take is Easy and keep those Peaceful Easy Feelings.


	10. One Step Closer

Edith stood frozen looking between the two letters. She knew that one was from her grandmama but still seeing it in her hand made her nervous. The other read London Royal Hospital Whitechapel RD, Whitechapel.

Still at times ever the pessimist. Edith couldn't help but feel the letter would tell her there had been a mistake and she was not accepted after all. She decided to read her grandmama's letter first at least the rejection from her would hurt less.

Dear Cookie,

Good for you! It makes me quite proud that one of my grandchildren have embraced the American within. Nothing would make me prouder to help you achieve your goals. And if my money is what it takes to make that happen than I will happily assist you in your endeavors.

I am so very sorry about how your parents have reacted to your news. More so about your mother, as I remember her being like you once. Determined and strong-willed, with a mind of her own. She had it in her head that she was going to be a writer the next Jane Austen. Unfortunately, that never did happen. But in the end, it was her who got to choose the path in which she wanted to live her life.

And it is unfair that your mother feels you should not be given the courtesy. You are old enough and smart enough to know what you want, and I am ever so proud that you are doing something about.

I have sent the banknote straight to the London Royal Hospital. As you may have noticed already there is another banknote for two hundred pounds. That my girl is for your personal use. Buy some new stocking, baubles, or save it for a rainy day. Do as you wish with it, as long as you're doing it for yourself, and you're having fun as you're doing it.

I wish you well my girl, and the best of luck as you start your new journey. It may be hard at first leaving behind your family. But remember you are a Levinson we are hardworking, strong-willed people. You can do anything you set your mind to. Stay strong and be safe. Please do not forget to write to me, I always enjoy your letters.

Much Love,

Grandmama

With tears of joy streaming down Edith's face she set her grandmother's letter aside. Practically tearing the other one open her eyes frantically scanned the letter.

Dear Miss Crawley,

We are happy to inform you that your tuition has been received and your application processed. You are to report to The London Royal Hospital.

Not even finishing the letter Edith shot up from her spot under the tree. Jumping up and down unable to contain her joy and excitement. Edith stood frozen looking between the two letters. She knew that one was from her grandmama but still seeing it in her hand made her nervous. The other read London Royal Hospital Whitechapel RD, Whitechapel.

Still at times ever the pessimist. Edith couldn't help but feel the letter would tell her there had been a mistake and she was not accepted after all. She decided to read her grandmama's letter first at least the rejection from her would hurt less.

Dear Cookie,

Good for you! It makes me quite proud that one of my grandchildren have embraced the American within. Nothing would make me prouder to help you achieve your goals. And if my money is what it takes to make that happen than I will happily assist you in your endeavors.

I am so very sorry about how your parents have reacted to your news. More so about your mother, as I remember her being like you once. Determined and strong-willed, with a mind of her own. She had it in her head that she was going to be a writer the next Jane Austen. Unfortunately, that never did happen. But in the end, it was her who got to choose the path in which she wanted to live her life.

And it is unfair that your mother feels you should not be given the courtesy. You are old enough and smart enough to know what you want, and I am ever so proud that you are doing something about.

I have sent the banknote straight to the London Royal Hospital. As you may have noticed already there is another banknote for two hundred pounds. That my girl is for your personal use. Buy some new stocking, baubles, or save it for a rainy day. Do as you wish with it, as long as you're doing it for yourself, and you're having fun as you're doing it.

I wish you well my girl, and the best of luck as you start your new journey. It may be hard at first leaving behind your family. But remember you are a Levinson we are hardworking, strong-willed people. You can do anything you set your mind to. Stay strong and be safe. Please do not forget to write to me, I always enjoy your letters.

Much Love,

Grandmama

With tears of joy streaming down Edith's face she set her grandmother's letter aside. Practically tearing the other one open her eyes frantically scanned the letter.

Dear Miss Crawley,

We are happy to inform you that your tuition has been received and your application processed. You are to report to The London Royal Hospital.

Not even finishing the letter Edith shot up from her spot under the tree. Jumping up and down unable to contain her joy and excitement.

After checking with absolute certainty, she had read the letters correctly. Edith found herself on the path to the village at a hurried pace with only Cottage hospital in mind. With the speed, Edith was walking it didn't take long to reach her destination. Normally the first thing Edith did when arriving at Cottage Hospital Edith went straight to work. Instead, she made a b line for the staff dining room, where she suspected cousin Isobel would be sitting down for lunch.

Upon walking into the staff room, Edith was happy that her assumption was correct. Seeing as Isobel was seated in the staff dining room with a cup of tea, thankfully alone.

"Cousin Isobel!" Edith closed the door and sat in the seat next to Isobel. "I have the best news, and I want you to be the first to know!" Thrusting the letter from the Royal Hospital Edith sat back with a smile and waited.

A smile formed on the older woman's face before she looked up from the letter. "Oh, Edith my dear this is the best of news indeed." Pulling Edith into a hug, Isobel spoke again. "I am so happy your parents finally came around."

Edith sat and cleared her throat and gave a nervous smile. "Actually, cousin Isobel my parents have yet to come around."

"Edith, I don't mean to overstep but if they still oppose how on earth did you get the money to pay for tuition?"

"The day of the argument I decided to write my grandmother in America. I knew if anyone could help me it would be her. She is quite the progressive. Much to my delight, she sent the money straight to the Hospital. She wrote to me giving me her full support."

"That is fantastic!" Before Isobel could say more, a cafeteria worker walked into the room with lunch.

"Lady Edith, I'm sorry I didn't realize you were here. Will you be joining Mrs. Crawley for lunch today?"

"If it's not to much trouble."

"Not at all Milady." Setting down the tray, the older woman wiped her hands on her apron.

"I shall be back momentarily with your tray."

Once alone again Isobel spoke. " How will you tell your parents you are leaving?"

"I haven't thought of that yet."

"If you wish I will happily be there when you tell them. Though, I'm not sure it will make much of a difference."

"I was hoping to leave a letter, and make my escape in the dead of night," Edith admitted lowering her head. "Though I suppose that will do more bad than good?"

"I am afraid so my dear girl. You aren't some criminal. You needn't act as though you are committing a crime." At the sound of the door opening, Isobel took a drink of tea.

"Thank you so very much, Bertha, sorry for the inconvenience."

"Not at all Milady." Bertha smiled shutting the door on her way out.

"Now I am not saying this is what you should do. I am merely letting you know what I would do if I were in your situation."

Edith couldn't help the chuckle that escaped. "Cousin Isobel I am beginning to fear you are a bad influence on me after all."

Isobel laughed before she divulged her "hypothetical" master plan.

* * *

Yaa! I finally have some Earl Grey in my cup and the words are flowing. I am sorry for the slow build up, but I promise things will be moving along soon. And don't worry this Sir Anthony will make an appearance here shortly. Just a reminder this is completely my own take on the characters but I am trying to incorporate the original character traits as well. I hope I'm not doing to bad a job. Please let me know, in the mean time enjoy your weekend. Take it Easy and enjoy those Peaceful Easy Feelings.


	11. Goodbye to You

Monday, January 5th, 1915. Nervous, Edith smiled to herself as she looked at the calendar one last time. Today was the day she was going to break her mother's heart, anger her father, and cause her Granny to disown her.

But today was also the day her life began. She was no longer going to be the other Crawley daughter living in her sister's shadows. Sure, it would be nice to know she had the support of her parents. But she decided she was no longer going to be that child seeking approval she knew was never going to come. It was time to stop playing the martyr and stop caring what others thought of her.

"You can do this Edith," Edith said back to her reflection in the mirror. "Remember what cousin Isobel said. "If you are to be a nurse you have to have courage." I can do this." Taking a deep breath, Edith took one last look around her room. Feeling that somehow this room represented her old life, that now felt foreign to her. And now she was saying goodbye. Knowing that after what she was about to do would change her life forever.

"Farewell." She whispered as she walked out of the room, not looking back as she shut the door.

The halls of Downton were already buzzing with life, as the servants were up and about like clockwork working on their various tasks. Edith made her way to her parent's room going over in her head the speech had been working on for two months. She had rehearsed it many times with Cousin Isobel. But now as she stood outside her parent's room; she realized nothing could have prepared her for this moment.

She so wished she could have left a note and left in the night. But Isobel talked her out of it, and even though it would have been easier. Edith knew that in the long run, this was for the best. Plus if she couldn't face her parents, how was she going to be able to handle war?

Calling on all the strength and courage from within, Edith raised her hand and knocked on her parent's door.

Edith waited at the door, for what felt like the longest minute of her life. With no answer, she knocked again. This time he fathers gruff voice beckoned her in.

"Edith Darling what is matter." Was the immediate response from her mother when she walked into the room.

"Nothing is the matter, Mama. It's just, I have to speak to you and Papa."

"And this couldn't wait until later today?" Robert asked somewhat put out as he scooted up, so he was now sitting against the headboard.

"No, as a matter of fact, it cannot wait."

"Edith, why are you in your traveling clothes?" Her mother interrupted.

"Ah, well that ties into what I want to discuss." Clearing her throat, she squared her shoulder and held her head high as she spoke. "I am catching the nine o'clock train to London today. Where I will be living for the next year, give or take, whilst I attend nursing school at the Royal London Hospital."

There was a defining silence that fell over the room before Cora spoke.

"I beg your pardon?"

But before Edith could answer Robert was out of bed and yelling.

"That is completely and utterly absurd. I already told you I would not be paying for that damned school. So get the bloody idea out of your head!"

"The decision is not up to you. It is my life Papa, and I know you think me to be some hapless little girl who can't face the world on her own. But I'm not, women are stronger than you give us credit for, and that is what I am, a woman. Whether you like it or not I am an adult that means from now on I get to choose what I do with my life." Edith shouted matching her father.

"Robert please calm down. And Edith that is no way to speak to your father and me" Cora, who was now out of bed spoke cautiously as she approached them. "Now, the last time that we had a dispute nothing got resolved, this time we are going to sit and talk this out."

"There is nothing to discuss Cora. For I have already told you I am not wasting my money on the damned school. And she SURE AS HELL ISN'T GOING EVEN IF SHE HAD THE MONEY HERSELF."

Outside the door, Sybil and Mary were listening to the argument. Eyes wide as there father's voice billowed throughout the halls. Their father was a passionate man, and even sometimes while angry he resorted to shouting. They had never heard him this angry, or speak in such a manner.

"Do you know what is going on?" Mary whispered to Sybil.

"No, I got here seconds before you did."

"Father is right. There is nothing to discuss I am leaving whether you like it or not. I've said before it is my life and I shall do with it as I please. I am sorry if you can't accept that." Edith stood there Chest heaving and face blotched with anger. The old Edith would have shrieked away immediately at her fathers yelling. But she was no longer that girl. Tired of going around in circles with her father on the matter she spoke with finality. "I am leaving now, I will write when I get settled. I hope that you can find it in your heart to accept this." She stepped forward and gave her mother a kiss on the cheek. Cora wanted to say something, anything so she could fix this, but when she opened her mouth no words came out.

She wanted nothing more than hold on to her daughter. It hurt that as a child Edith never went to Cora like the other girls. She was always so independent in fact that Cora often found herself looking over Edith. Ashamed at the thought Cora promised herself right there that the least she could do for the forgotten middle child was give her support on this.

"Be safe my girl," Cora whispered as she hugged Edith.

"I will mama," Edith responded giving a watery smile and let go of her mother.

"Maybe there is hope," She thought but that was short lived when she moved to give her father a hug and kiss.

Promptly turning away, he spoke, "Edith if you leave this house, don't plan on coming back."

Edith stood wide-eyed staring at her father's back. "I... What?"

Turning Robert was stone-faced as he spoke again. "If you go against my wishes and leave this house. Not only have you not welcomed here any longer, you are no longer part of this family. Do you understand? "

"Robert, that is ridiculous. She is our daughter."

"No… no daughter of mine would blatantly disrespect me and go against my wishes." Turning back to Edith he spoke. "So, what is it going to be? Are you going to come to your senses and forget this absurd Idea? Or are you going to turn your back on your family."

"I am not turning my back on no one." Edith bit back," It is you who is being completely mental. Why Papa can't you just let me be happy? If it were Mary or Sybil would you protest so much? Would you hurt them as you have me? In your eyes, Sybil can do no wrong. She could commit a murder or run away with Gardner and you would forgive her in a heartbeat. Mary slept with a man and later had him die in her bed. And you forgave her like what happened was an everyday occurrence. Yet I want to make something of myself and you treat me as if I was Kaiser Bill himself."

Heavy silence fell upon the occupants of the room, and the two outside the door.

Cora was looking frantically between her middle daughter and husband. "Robert." Ready to plead with him. But she stopped herself knowing that right now was not the best time. She knew her husband and she knew it would take a while for him to calm down so she could make him see sense. But until then she knew all attempts would be futile.

Edith no longer caring about the tears that were streaming down her face cleared her throat. "I suppose this is goodbye then."

Robert didn't say a word in response. Instead he turned and walked away going straight into his dressing room and closing the door rather loudly behind him.

"Edith," Cora moved next to the broken girl. "I am so sorry my girl give him time. He will come around eventually. But until then I want you to know."

"Mama please …. just…. Just stop okay. He has made it perfectly clear what he thinks and how he feels about me." Edith gave her mother one last hug. "I appreciate the effort but it just isn't going to work this time."

Now Cora was the one with tears streaming down her face as she watched her middle daughter walk away from her, and into the world.

Edith was halfway down the stairs when Sybil's frantic calling of her name stopped her.

She hardly had time to react when as soon as she turned around her sister's arms were around her neck. Clinging to her like her life depended on it.

"Oh, Edith that was horrific. How can papa be so cruel?" She cried.

Edith couldn't help but chuckle. Sybil always was the empathetic one, taking everything to heart.

"It's okay Sybil. I am fine, and as much as I love you and your bone crushing hugs. I really have to be leaving Branson is out front, and I have a train to catch."

"So, you're really leaving then?" Mary stated more than asked as she gracefully cascaded down the stairs, looking like cleopatra herself. "I thought this was just another one of your ploys to get attention. Never thought you would actually go through with it."

"Where is it you are going exactly Edith?" Sybil asked wiping her eyes dry.

"Nursing school at London Royal Hospital. Now if you would excuse me I really have to be leaving." She gave Sybil a hug before turning to Mary. Defeated she gave a sigh and hugged Mary quickly pulling away.

"Write me?" Sybil asked. Trying not to laugh at the obviously shocked Mary next to her.

"I will Sybie." With one last look, Edith descend the stairs, and just like in her room. left without looking back.

* * *

I some may think this is completely out of character for Robert. But don't worry his reaction will be explained in due time. I hope you all enjoy. Please review I always look forward to reading them. And sorry about all the imperfections, once I am finished with this story I will go back and fix everything. I do wait a few days in between witting and publishing just to try and catch as many mistakes as I can. Take it Easy and keep that Peaceful Easy Feeling. (P.S. the person who can tie together my screen name and the references at the end of my comments. I shall love you for ever.)


	12. A Day in the Life

Friday, February 5th. 1915

"Please Edith with a cherry on top?"

Leaning against her headboard Edith closed her eyes and took a relaxing breath. "I am sorry Ebba but I am too tired. Dr. Sherman singled me out all day again. I am really starting to think that he hates me." finishing with a child like whine.

"He doesn't hate you." Ebba said unconvincingly as she sat on the bed next to Edith.

"See." Edith cried. "He does hate me."

Ebba laughed at Edith's child like antics. "He doesn't hate you really, he is very strict with everyone. But you've had a rough day that gives you all the more reason to come on the town with us girls."

"Ebba I really appreciate it, I do. But I am just too tired. I have letters to write, and I don't want to get caught. That would give Sheman more ammunition to hate me. And possibly throw me out of the school."

"They won't throw you out Edith. They may act strict here. But they know us girls like to let loose every once in awhile. And they also know they can't catch us all."

Sighing Edith burrowed further in bed. "You go on ahead without me Ebba and have some fun. I am too tired and I would ruin everyone's time. I promise I will go next time."

"Are you sure Edie? It will be fun." Ebba pleaded one last time.

"I am positive." was Edith's sleepy response.

"Suite yourself." Ebba stood. "But mark my words Edith Crawley you will be joining us next time."

Edith smiled at her friend. "Anything you Say Ebbie"

Edith was laying in her bed relaxed and clean after her shower. A lot of the other girls decided to go out on the town that night. It was technically against the rules to do so. But the administration found it tiresome to try and track down, and discipline everyone who left. As long as no men were in the rooms, a blind eye was turned. Edith had yet to go on one of the night outings. It wasn't because she didn't like the other girls. She just couldn't find herself to want to do those kinds of things. Even though she tried not to care, her broken relationship with her family hurt her. She had written her mother once and the letter she got back was full of doubt and questioning. It had hurt Edith because for a moment she really thought her mother was going to support her without criticizing. She had also received multiple letters from her Granny that she has yet to respond to, and is doubting that she ever will. The only people that she has kept in regular contact with are Isobel, Grandma Levison, and Sybil.

The transition from Downton to the dorms was easier than she had anticipated. She found living out from under the thumb of her family was more freeing than she had ever thought possible. And so far she was counting her first month away from home a success.

Not only had she made friends rather quickly, she felt like she was coming into herself. Here she wasn't Lady Crawley Second daughter of the Earl of Grantham. She was just Edith nurse in training. The second week of being there, her roommate convinced her to cut her hair. Not only would it be more practical but she said that at shoulder length it would complement her bone structure beautifully.

Now Edith's hair was shoulder length, and often worn in a bun tied with a ribbon, but her favorite way to wear her new hair was down. Growing up at Downton she was never allowed to wear her hair down and free. But now every chance she got it was down.

Ebba was the first person she became friends with at orientation and they opted on being roommates. The third and youngest child of a Barista from Gloucestershire Ebba was raised middle class and was different than anyone Edith was close to. She was down to earth yet she had class and Edith loved every minute they spent together.

Sighing Edith got up and walked over to her desk. Going over her notes from the day she couldn't help but feel saddened by the fact that it was friday night and she had no one to court her. Although it wasn't for her lack of suitors. She surprisingly had a few young men who had more than once tried to woo her. It just everytime she agreed to have lunch or tea with them, she always ended up comparing them to the man who still much to her dismay held her heart in his hands.

"Let's not think of him now Edith old girl." She quietly convinced herself. Shaking herself out of her thoughts she went back to her notes. Settling herself deeper into her chair she prepared herself for the long night of studying ahead.

 **Saturday, February 6th. 1915**

"Up and at em' Ladies, We have an emergency lesson. Get ready and be down by Zero Four Hundred Hours." Edith groaned as she lifted her head from her desk. Looking around she was disoriented at first. Then realizing what what happening she jumped up and turned the light on. Surveying the room she rolled her eyes. Ebba has a trail of clothes leading from the door to her bed. Sighing she walked over to Ebba's bed.

"Wake up Ebba. Old Lady McGonigal barged in. It seems we have some time of drill." Edith said loudly shaking her roommate awake.

"You tell Old Lady McGonigal were she can shove her bloody drill."

Edith couldn't help the giggle that escaped her mouth at her roommates obvious discomfort after a long night of God only knows what.

Rolling out of bed disheveled and tired Ebba gave Edith a death glare, "I am glad you are finding humor in my hour of pain and suffering."

Edith was going to respond when her two quad mate walk through there shared bathroom straight into her room. Unable to help herself she laughed even harder at the three miserable looking girls in her room.

"You know now I am really happy I did not join your escapades last night. For I fear I would look twice as bad you as you lot do."

"You know what Levinson you know where you can stick your laughter and goodie two shoe ways?" Laurel said as she threw herself on Edith bed.

"The place I can shove my drill, I am sure Ms. Couter." All four girls stood at attention. Edith dared glanced at her roommate who was red faced and looking at the floor. "I woke you so you could be down stairs in less than five minutes, not so you can him haw around with each other. And let me assure you girls this is not a drill, not this time. Get ready and be at the infirmary right away.

The room was silent when Ms. McGonigal left the room. " This sounds serious." Laurel said as she sat back down on Edith's bed.

"I am sure it is if she didn't give Ebba a scolding." Edith remarked trying to lighten the room up a little. With one to her roommate they both burst out laughing.

"Would one of you like to explain what you two are laughing about?"

Edith cleared her throat and caught her breath so she retell the story. But as soon as she went to open her mouth, more laughter came out, causing Ebba to join in this time harder. After a few minutes of back and forth laughter, Edith finally called it quits.

"I will tell you after the drill." She said pulling her hair in a bun so she could go wash her face and brush her teeth

The girls found themselves rushing down the long corridor towards the last hall on the right where the other girls were already gathered listening to what sounded like Dr. Sherman speak. Quietly they blended into the crowd.

"As you were all told earlier this is not a drill. In this then an hour we will have truck loads of injured men coming through our infirmary. Some are ready to be transferred to a facility but a lot are right off the battlefield. There was an attack on our men and they are being sent all over the country at the moment. Since we are the closest hospital with the resources we will be getting the hard cases. I am warning you now, this is not like what you are used to. For a lot of you this will be the deciding factor in your career as a nurse."

"I thought the war was at a stand still. I haven't read any new developments." Ebba whispered.

"It is too early in the war for this right? I mean how close are they if" Edith answered.

"Levinson" Edith's head snapped up to see the face of an angry Dr. Sherman staring straight at her. It was like the crowd had parted so he could get a perfect look at her he was admonishing her in front of the whole class again. "First you are late, and now you distract me by carrying on a conversation while I am trying to prepare you for what is to come."

"Dr. Sherman I am sor."

"Save it for later" Sherman interrupted. "The trucks are pulling in. Get ready ladies." Quietly they all started to shuffle about gathering supplies when Dr. Sherman once again addressed the class. "Levinson set my station up, you are with me today."

Ebba looked at Edith with apologetic eyes. "Yes Dr." Edith called out, upset at herself got not being able to hide the tremble in her voice as she addressed the older man.

As soon as Sherman walked out of the room Edith threw her head back and gave a groan.

"I am sorry Edith. Good luck with that one Edith. You can do this Edith" Were some of the words of encouragement that others offered as they passed by her.

Edith made her way to Dr. Sherman's usual room, setting it up, and trying to give herself a pep talk all at once. She was pulled out of her thoughts when her doors slammed up.

"Set him down," Dr. Sherman yelled as he ran in after pulling his gloves on and tying his apron around him. "Levinson, get over here I need my tools. We have a man here gang green"

She knew he was still talking she could tell by the way his mouth was still moving and looking at her expectantly. But she couldn't process it anymore all she concentrate on was the smell. Her eyes were watering, and she couldn't tell if it was from the gruesome sight before her or the smell.

"EDITH," pulled out of her ravine, "If you can't be of use get the fuck out of my operating room. I have no time for to hold your hand and walk you through every fucking thing." Dr. Sherman was now in her face. "Do you understand?"

She was frozen she couldn't Believe it. Here she is with Dr. Sherman getting her chance to show him but she could do this and she can't get herself to move. It's like she's having an outer body experience everything in her is telling her to move but as she stands there and watches that boy screamed out in agony. She can't move can't bloody move.

* * *

 _ **Sorry I have been gone so long, a lot has happen since I last posted. I started culinary school, got a job. Finished culinary school, quit my job, had a mental break down and moved to a different state. All is good and well now. I want to start posting weekly, I am not done with this story. Please bear with me people as I try to figure out a posting schedule. I am looking for a beta writer or collaborator so please let me know if you are interested.**_


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